Thursday, April 4, 2013

The Eyes and I's it Takes to Realize

"There are some lessons you have to learn the hard way," Georgie agrees with me when we talk about seventh grade and how it went wrong. 

For her, it was Di. For me, it was the matter of finding me and a place I was comfortable in. And that didn't finish until around this time last year. One of the reasons was that me and Nash went down a really rocky road, started by me.

You've got to understand two things. The first is that I was over dramaticizing everything as usual, and thinking that I had it worse off than I really did. I had no best friend back then and nobody real to talk to, and my guy problems {or guy problem, should I say} was being an issue to. 

The second is that Nash is pretty much the perfect person. She's beautiful and talented and a great singer {which comes with talented} and sweet and basically, everything. So although her naturally amazing person had done nothing to upset me, I chose her to pour the blame on. And once she read what I wrote, she didn't yell back like I wanted her to {I guess I just wanted someone to feel sorry for me}. Instead it was mostly a time of sadness and me looking in the mirror and hating me more than usual. 

Nowadays, me and Nash are, in her words, "Closer than we've ever been." That's true, because last year although there hadn't been anything really between us, it was sort of strange since she wasn't as close of a friend as we had been in elementary school. But then some things happened that opened our eyes.

So that story just ties into what I want to talk about today--realizing things. Learning a lesson the second time because you were too stupid to remember what it taught you the first time. That moment when you sigh and smile at the same time because it's finally solved.

Like the moment I had last night.

So yesterday was something I didn't really want to talk about it because while I watched The Tenth Kingdom with Literally, Nash, Vanessa, Georgie and Blaund at Kahler's house, I felt really down and sad and annoyed and frustrated that I never got anything. I'm not going to go much into it because I already ranted in my journal, those pages I want to tear out now because I get it.

My lesson for today is that you should never forget anything that something or somebody teaches you, because you're going to need it again someday.

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